Firemen Know How to Handle Their Hose
The bank next door to my office is on fire. I guess it's in the attic, so let's hope it stays there. The wind is about 30 mi/hr, so if it gets out, my hair is going to smell like smoke for days.
Needless to say, it's quite the bit of excitement here in Hickville. I think the entire fire department is on the street right now, which includes 3/4 of the males over 18 in town. Two ambulances drove by my house at about 60 mi/hr, despite the fact that there are no injuries. I guess if you mow down a pedestrian on the way to a fire you at least have someone to transport back to the hospital. Hate to make a wasted trip.
Half the town is standing out on Main Street watching the goings-on. Most importantly, the streets are blocked off, so I had to hoof it a block back to work in the wind, in heels, and through a crowd of firemen. Lemme tell ya, that's only a treat in a Diet Coke commercial. In RL, the firemen are the same overweight dorks you went to high school with that spend more time peeing off the back of a fire truck than fighting blazes. And since they're all volunteer, this gets them out of their boring jobs for the afternoon, and they get to go play hero for a few hours. That guarantees them an evening of drinking beer at the fire hall and telling tales of how they barely made it out alive.
Our cute chief of police is standing in the middle of the street directing traffic. He seems confident and capable, and all the young ladies are swooning. And now he just shot his chew spit farther than any other sandbilly on the block. Golly gee, I sure is glad we got one of them there high-class po-licemen protecting us. Great googly-moogly.
Years ago, the building next to our office had a fire that totaled the building. The lackeys in our office spent their time hauling file cabinets out the back door, while everything else in the building got hosed down. That better not happen today. I have a bad back and a light-colored shirt.
Needless to say, it's quite the bit of excitement here in Hickville. I think the entire fire department is on the street right now, which includes 3/4 of the males over 18 in town. Two ambulances drove by my house at about 60 mi/hr, despite the fact that there are no injuries. I guess if you mow down a pedestrian on the way to a fire you at least have someone to transport back to the hospital. Hate to make a wasted trip.
Half the town is standing out on Main Street watching the goings-on. Most importantly, the streets are blocked off, so I had to hoof it a block back to work in the wind, in heels, and through a crowd of firemen. Lemme tell ya, that's only a treat in a Diet Coke commercial. In RL, the firemen are the same overweight dorks you went to high school with that spend more time peeing off the back of a fire truck than fighting blazes. And since they're all volunteer, this gets them out of their boring jobs for the afternoon, and they get to go play hero for a few hours. That guarantees them an evening of drinking beer at the fire hall and telling tales of how they barely made it out alive.
Our cute chief of police is standing in the middle of the street directing traffic. He seems confident and capable, and all the young ladies are swooning. And now he just shot his chew spit farther than any other sandbilly on the block. Golly gee, I sure is glad we got one of them there high-class po-licemen protecting us. Great googly-moogly.
Years ago, the building next to our office had a fire that totaled the building. The lackeys in our office spent their time hauling file cabinets out the back door, while everything else in the building got hosed down. That better not happen today. I have a bad back and a light-colored shirt.
Labels: excitement, freaks n geeks, sandbillies
posted by trinamick at 1:13 PM
10 Comments:
Hey, burnt money spends the same, doesn't it? Go stand outside in the breeze!
Ahhh yes... the joys of a volunteer fire department...
Do they all take the job waaaaaay too seriously there too?
I'll tell a tale about ours one of these days... don't let me forget.
They have fire trucks there? I envisioned a hoard of people passing buckets back and forth from someone furiously cranking the lever on the hand pump.
Word verification: reepr.
Hey! A post!!
I think I'll move to Hickville and start setting buildings on fire. At least you'll post...for about a week, until the seventh and final building goes up....
I kept an eye out, but no flaming Benjamins came near me. Except for one, but he prefers to be called Benji.
We refer to the local firemen as the Pissin' Crew. They spend all night drinking at the fire hall, and you pray your house doesn't burn that night. One of them was so drunk one night that he fell off the back of the fire truck and broke his leg.
We have about 8 or 9 fire trucks. They're purty. No dalmatians though.
There are plenty of arsonists in this town. But I try to keep my family sober, so no recent damage.
The chief of our local fire department works as a salesman where I work. I've known him since I was a kid and he was one of the teenage drunks throwing bottles on the roof of the Board of Education. Yep. Firemen are the same everywhere I think. ;)
no need to dramatize small town life in this post, eh?
Now, we need the after-story.
Sadly, it did not burn the sucker down. After several hours over there, I don't think they even really found fire. I suspect the employees pulled the alarms and took the day off.
I don't believe we know where Evil Twin Biff was at that time.
Coincidence?
Maybe.
Wow. A month goes by and I finally come around. Commenting now would be about as timely as saying, "Too bad about that Lindbergh baby getting kidnapped."
Great post as always, trina.
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